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Who are you caring for?
Which best describes their mobility?
How well are they maintaining their hygiene?
How are they managing their medications?
Does their living environment pose any safety concerns?
Fall risks, spoiled food, or other threats to wellbeing
Are they experiencing any memory loss?
Which best describes your loved one's social life?
Acknowledgment of Disclosures and Authorization
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
Share a few details and we will match you to trusted home care in your area:
She does not believe she's in $55,000.00 worth of debt. She thinks that because she paid off her house which she took out a $30,000.00 equity load to do to cut down on her payments. She's only paying $ 285.00 a month on that loan.
Does your mom have dementia? If so, trying to logically talk to her about finances may be impossible. Tell us more about your situation.
Can you sit down with her bills and print out invoices (credit cards, mortgage, equity loan) and show her how it adds up? Why won't that work? There must be more going on, so we need more information. She understand she already has $30,000 of debt because of the equity loan, right?
It can be very hard to get control of stubborn elders finances particularly if dementia is involved. My older brother died suddenly about 3 years ago. I was able to convince my Dad, who had mild dementia, to give me a broad POA and access to all accounts. This was quite a bit of paperwork, forms from the banks to sign etc.
My mom was in the hospital at the time and Dad saw what the future could hold for them. I used the JUST IN CASE SOMETHING EVER HAPPENS TO YOU. Logic on Dad. I have been take care of bills and finances ever since. He thinks Moms doing it it.
His dementia is such that now I would never convince him to sign anything. He thinks everthing is just fine and they need no help. The reality is, they are very close to needing assited living.
Before she's deemed incompetent, I would see if she will sign Durable POA and Healthcare POA, Living Will, etc. immediately. Maybe she will agree to do that if she thinks it may be needed down the road. If she agrees, I would then start to oversee her finances and gradually have the mail come to you. I would say whatever works to get that done so you can help divert a crisis.
Does she exhibit any other signs of decline?
If she refuses, then there's not much you can do except wait for it to progress. You might check with an Elder Care attorney about filing for guardianship and if you have a good case based on what has happened so far. Does her doctor say she has dementia?
It will likely be impossible. Our mom had dementia and paranoia and would not allow our help. She trusted us all our whole lives and suddenly she couldn't. My father did not have dementia but was sick. He did not believe he would die. He saw no hurry to give us POA. We warned him we would be in a mess trying to manage mom without him. Then he died. Mom was hallucinating daily. We couldn't even see the bills as she would hide them. Luckily on a good day we got her to add my brothers name to her account. We began intercepting her mail to get the bills and to pay them. It was an awful time. Later we went to court to get total control. No family should have to wait until this happens. No family should have to take their parent to court. Is there any way you can get her to give you POA or add you to account?
By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
Can you sit down with her bills and print out invoices (credit cards, mortgage, equity loan) and show her how it adds up? Why won't that work? There must be more going on, so we need more information. She understand she already has $30,000 of debt because of the equity loan, right?
Start by engaging a elder affairs lawyer, This must not be a do it yourself project.
My mom was in the hospital at the time and Dad saw what the future could hold for them. I used the JUST IN CASE SOMETHING EVER HAPPENS TO YOU. Logic on Dad. I have been take care of bills and finances ever since. He thinks Moms doing it it.
His dementia is such that now I would never convince him to sign anything. He thinks everthing is just fine and they need no help. The reality is, they are very close to needing assited living.
Does she exhibit any other signs of decline?
If she refuses, then there's not much you can do except wait for it to progress. You might check with an Elder Care attorney about filing for guardianship and if you have a good case based on what has happened so far. Does her doctor say she has dementia?