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my daughter lives in a nursing home. several weeks ago she started to show signs of kidney infection. this went of for several days at the home. none of the staff seemed to notice my daughter was sick with a high temperature,; sleeping a lot. listlessness etc. finally she ended up in the hospital with a temp of 41.6c
after being in the hospital for a week she was released and sent back to the nursing home. now here's my problem. I went to visit my daughter's doctor and I wrote a letter showing my concern with what I thought was bad care given my dauther leading up to her hospital. in the letter I asked the doctor if he could talk with the people at the nursing home about my concern, and for him to ask the staff at the nursing home to keep an eye on my daughter in the future because of her prone ness to infections. what the doctor did made me angry and I don't know if I have a right to be angry. but rather than speak with anyone at the nursing home the doctor mailed this letter to the nursing home to the administrator.
the administrator called me into the office yesterday and we had a long meeting as she told me what a good job the home was doing with residents. which I don't agree with.
thank you

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You asked the doctor to speak with the nursing home staff. I don't know where you are, but in the US it would be quite unusual for a doctor to visit a nursing home (unless he or she was on the staff) and call a meeting or speak to individuals.

Your note did not indicate that your request was confidential, did it? So the doctor, wanting not to ignore your concerns, contacted the nursing home on your behalf. Personally, I don't think you have cause to be angry about this. But if you are angry, you are angry. Fine. But my advice is to try not to cause trouble for the doctor.

In the US, the person to contact when there are concerns about a nursing home's level of care (after talking to the nursing home directly) is the Ombudsman. That person is paid to look into issues such as a delay in treating a person with obvious symptoms. Do they have that position where you live?

Also in the US nursing homes are required to have regular care conferences that the family can attend. My mother's NH has them every 3 months and one or more of her daughters always attends. Staff talk about how she is doing in their area (dietary reports on whether she is eating well, for example) and we express our concerns. Are there such meetings at your daughter's nursing home?

I hope now that the administrator knows there is family concern and that a doctor is aware of it they will be especially vigilant with your daughter!
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Caper, because you are concened the doc is also concerned. By writing the letter he is protecting himself against malpractice. Make sure you document your meeting with the administrator. Just notes to self, then email your version of the discussion to the nursing home. Include what was talked about, what resolution they propose, what they will do differently, etc.
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