My wife has advanced AD. I am 72 and her sole caregiver at home. I have her on an alternating pressure mattress for most of the day and on a wheelchair with a Roho Mosaic Seat Cushion when she's not too tired to sit for a while. I have her wearing pull-up briefs with booster pads for occasional incontinence because she's able to stand long enough for me to put them on. I have washable absorbent pads on her bed for occasional leaks. Her speech is unintelligible due to aphasia and she's not able to follow instructions. Because she can't tell me she needs to go to the bathroom and there are no other cues, how often should I help her to the bathroom? Also, how do you tell if a brief is soiled and needs to be changed? I am physically able to help her and mentally determined. I just need to learn more about how.
That's probably a good schedule for taking her to the bathroom, if she is able to use the toilet still.
Pull-ups do not provide enough protection or absorbency for complete incontinence. Buy some tabbed diapers and at least have them on hand and ready when you are ready to switch. I like the Tena and McKesson brands for my husband. I buy online at Vitality Medical.com. You can also get adult diapers (or briefs) at Walgreens and Walmart. Adult tabbed briefs have a line on the front which indicates when it needs to be changed. You can tell by looking that it has absorbed liquid.
If you don't already, make sure you have gloves available. They come in Latex, Vinyl, and Nitrile. I like the nitrile; vinyl is ok. For fecal incontinence, you can probably smell it, but use a gloved finger to insert into the edge of the diaper to check.
Washable absorbent pads are great. I have started using more disposable pads because I was doing a couple loads of laundry every day, and needed something more practical. It's easy to dispose of a disposable pad - just roll it up and replace with a dry one. I like to use one on top of another with washable and/or disposable pads, so when you remove a wet one, there is still a dry one underneath.
I commend you and understand the devotion to taking care of your spouse as long as you are able. I have been taking care of my husband for 10 years. He suffered a massive stroke at the age of 53, leaving him bedridden, with aphasia and in diapers. He was kicked out of the nursing home a year later. We are both 64 now. I had no idea what I was in for or what I was doing. Whenever I had a question, I just typed it in to Google Search and got a lot of good information.
Reading your story, I just would like to recommend buying a power lift/recliner for your wife when she is able to sit up. It helps just to have her in a different position with her weight distributed differently, so she doesn't develop pressure ulcers (bed sores). Even if it is for a few hours at a time, so you can wipe down the bed and change the bedding. It gives her a different view, and redistributes her weight.
8 am
12.30
4.30
7pm
i think you need to resign to your mothers incontinence and have her cleaned about that many times
we use
( depends on funds)
disposable pull on pants
inside those incontinence pads
you can take them out and throw away abs replace with another pad
we use large body wipes dipped in water with sone shower or bath wash and a little disinfectant
for bowel movement put tissues in kitchen isomer helps to hold them
morning after the wipe of soiled wipe down with flannel
we pat dry with soft hanky tyke tissue and
barrier cream to stop any sores /rashes
i use cheap pedal bin bags to wrap soiled pants in and we keep a bin outside
you need gloves and towel if you are going full body wipe down
we use a couple cheap plastic washing bins one for body one for private area - different colour flannels for each
just incase that helps
—
so I would say stick to carers time or 10 mins after eating
This was doable and it got him up and moving a bit changing positions to lessen the possibility of pressure sores.
If the brief is dry there is no need to change it.
But checking also allows you to monitor the condition of her skin.
Is it getting pink, is there a rash forming. Are there red or pink lines or marks from where a fabric fold caused a bit of pressure? If so smooth out any fabric so that it lays against her skin smoothly. Same with a shirt or blouse.
Because she is able to walk, it is very good for her body to still move. I did the same with my Dad, I used the pull ons with a booster pad. If in the bed, you can tear the sides of the pull ons, but it is easier to do I. The bathroom. Do you think if you gave her a small bell to ring, that she would be able to ring that to let you know she needs to use the bathroom? Just an idea. I gave my Dad a bell to ring for any reason during the day or night. I was almost always in the same room, but if I was putting laundry away or in the bathroom myself, he had the bell to alert me that he needed something. My Dad did not always talk as much as he used to, but was able to talk. I am sure it is difficult not to be able to communicate like before, but she is in there, the same wonderful woman you married and love. Maybe you can listen to music together, tv, read to her, and the walking to the bathroom every 2-3 hours is a little bit of exercise. It is better for her to have that movement. Even some chair exercises or bed movement is better than nothing. I am hopeful that you can hire some help to come in and help YOU! No matter how much you love someone, the constant caregiving can lead to exhaustion and burnout. The best way to avoid this, is to accept any help from family, friends, neighbors, or hired help. Help with inside & outside chores, food shopping or prep., laundry… etc… God bless you!
I wish you the best!
🙏❤️ 🍀
Since she cannot communicate when she needs the bathroom, keeping a simple log for several days may help you identify her usual pattern and build a regular toileting routine around it. Briefs should be checked frequently and changed promptly when wet or soiled, with careful skin checks and a moisture-barrier product recommended by her healthcare provider.
A home visit from an occupational therapist, continence nurse, or wound-care nurse could be especially useful—not to replace you, but to show you safer transfers, positioning, brief changes, and ways to protect both her skin and your back.
You should also be able to smell if her brief is soiled enough to have to change, or even feel the front of it to feel it's very warm from the pee, just like you would with a little one still wearing diapers. But if you're taking her to the bathroom every 2 hours you most likely won't have to change her very often, except once or twice a day like you would your underwear.
And might I also suggest that if the walk to the bathroom gets to be too much for your wife, you may want to invest in a bedside commode that you can keep next to her bed, or chair where she sits.
Bless you for being there for your wife when she needs you the most.
The briefs will appear yellowish on the inside and feel heavier, depending on how much urine. If it's easier, consider tab-style disposables.