
FIL rarely washes his hands. Has been living with myself and husband for 3 years when his wife passed. He is 90 years old with several health issues, including Parkinson’s, but is able to ambulate with a cane and take care of other hygiene measures, including brushing teeth, shaving, showers and dressing/undressing self. He can feed himself / checks and records daily vitals and weight. Has his own bathroom. I will hear the flushing of the toilet but will not hear water running afterwards. have checked soap dispenser, bar soap, sink, towel, and all appeared to be unused. I have left alcohol type cleansers, and those appear unused. I have seen him wash his hands before dinner at kitchen sink but not routinely. When confronted, he claims that he is washing his hands with bar soap. Became almost angry when I had that brief conversation - thoughts?
Good luck to you.
Bigger picture: do you want him to continue living with you? Meaning, is it just this one issue that's bothering you and if it's resolved you'll be happy, or is it kind of a "last-straw" or "situation becoming too much" symptom?
"Get back in there and wash your hands!"
Get the bar soap out of the bathroom so he can't say he used it.
Supervise his handwashing.
Send him to assisted living.
You can tell I've had a bad day with my Mom.
Also having Clorox type wipes around to wipe door knob’s, handles, etc. might be a good idea too.
And, agreed that men of this era grew up without hand washing being important or sometimes even easily possible, and I think that as they age they revert to ingrained habits and have a hard time following what doesn’t come natural, even if they intend to.
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