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Sky Funerals should be introduced here.

Waste not.
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Reply to ZippyZee
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If it's you , you are asking for absolutely not. If you don't want one, don't let anyone guilt you.

If it's for someone else, I believe you should respect the persons wishes, if it doesn't cost you money and within reason. If the person wishes for a big elaborate funeral, they should figure out how it will be paid for , way before death.

That the way I feel anyways
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Reply to Anxietynacy
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Are you asking for yourself or if you have to have a funeral for a loved one?

If you don't want them to have one for you when you pass away - I would just make your wishes clear to the loved one or Executor of your estate. They will have to do something - be it bury or cremate - and you can talk about all of that as well. But you can absolutely tell them that you don't wish to have a funeral.

As far as the other side of the question - if you are asking if you have to have one for a loved one - nope (in most cases). Unless they have PREPAID for an entire funeral AND left specific requirements for said funeral - in which case you probably have to HAVE it but that doesn't mean you have to tell anyone else about it - so you don't have to go through the process of having an actual funeral with receiving line and well wishes.

My FIL was in the middle. He wanted a "state" funeral. He had it all planned out, choirs, special speakers, special music, massive amounts of flowers, the most ornate coffin. You could tell he had envisioned it as if he would be there. (my FIL had NPD).

BUT...he never paid a penny to make those dreams come true. And frankly he didn't leave enough in his life insurance policy to cover even a third of what he wanted.

So, instead we did what WE wanted to do. Which was to cremate him and have no service.

In my opinion, funerals are for the living. And MANY MANY of the living are getting to the point where they don't want to go to funerals anymore if they can help it.
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Reply to BlueEyedGirl94
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You don’t “have” to do much of anything. If it brings you peace to skip having a funeral, do that
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Reply to Daughterof1930
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NO, you do what you want if you want.
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Reply to funkygrandma59
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This is as personal as dying.
If you are asking for yourself...YOU do what YOU want.
The best thing to do if possible is to pre plan and pre pay your funeral.
That way it is all done the way you want it done.
There is nothing that says you HAVE to have a "Wake", a Visitation, a funeral or a burial.
If you have everything pre planned the funeral home can be called and they will come and pick you up and begin to carry out your wishes.
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Reply to Grandma1954
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My DH and I are being cremated. I want no viewing or service. If my girls feel they want a memorial service, thats up to them. I told them to just go for a nice dinner.

I think COVID taught us that funerals are not really needed.
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Reply to JoAnn29
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Ugh; funerals. That was the topic at a dinner party my husband and I went to a couple years ago. I was the only one at the table who said I do not want a funeral, I do not want a memorial service, I do not want a celebration of life party, I do not want a gravesite for anyone to visit. I want to pop off into the ozone and be everywhere and nowhere. I will plan and pay for that in advance.

Although no one came right out and said it, it was implied that I am selfish for denying my loved ones the chance to mourn me and say goodbye; that “funerals are for the living”. I reject that. But I did tell my daughter that if at my death she feels the need, she can put together one of those online memorial sites where an obituary is posted and people add their farewells. If she doesn’t, it’s certainly not going to bother me up there in the ozone!
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Reply to Peasuep
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No, and let it be known that I am tired of going to them. There've been so many, and traveling to a funeral is difficult. I loved an online Gathering that my friend's family held after she passed! We all signed into it from our own computers and shared stories of what our friend had meant to us in our lives. Compared to the sadness, the coffin being wheeled out, the drooping flowers, and devastated wives, husbands and family of the deceased at a traditional funeral, the Gathering was uplifting. It was even fun to hear all the others' stories of our dear departed friend.

I'm not having a funeral other than military commitment honors when I join my husband in a national cemetery.

NOT having a funeral seems most considerate of others.
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Reply to Fawnby
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Hedgie Sep 25, 2024
Not sure which national cemetery you will be using, but I just had my mother interred at Arlington National Cemetry (Dad was US Navy in WWII and was interred in the Columbarium at Arlington 30 years ago.)

To say the service was short would be an understatement -- as the Spouse, Mom got a 5 minute service (after waiting 10 months to be interred). I don't know if all Veteran cemetaries have the same restrictions.
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Nope, and I don't want one, either.
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Reply to Tiredniece23
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There are very few, if any, bigger wastes of money than a funeral.
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Reply to ZippyZee
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Absolutely NOT.
In your will or trust make it clear that you want NO SERVICES or end of life gatherings.
No one in my family had services. I don't intend to and have said so in my End of Life documents.
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Reply to AlvaDeer
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No you don't. You just have to abide by state laws on how to dispose of a body according to that's states rules and regulations. Funerals are expensive and can be as complicated/simple as the person who's dead wishes them to be. Work with your loved one to find out what and how they want in terms of burial/cremation etc. and if they want a funeral.
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Reply to Jhalldenton
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