Can I bill the estate for being a live-in caregiver for my parent(s)?
I was asked by my parents to move into their home and help care for them back in 2006. I was not compensated for services provided. Can I bill the estate for being a full-time live-in caregiver for the past 11 yrs? Both parents had made a verbal commitment that there would be enough money from the sale of their home, I would be able to purchase a small home for myself. I felt that was adequate compensation for being their caregiver and not working outside the home. Here is the unfortunate part. My sibling who has DPOA has no intention of honoring this. Their house was put on the market, sold and my notice to vacate all happened over a 5 week period. My brother took my Dad to live with he and his wife, while I was left to pack up the house that my parents resided in for 40 yrs., and I am now homeless. My parents never felt the need to change their will because they believed that their Son having DPOA, he would do the right thing. My Mother passed away in 2012 and my Father is 93 yrs. old. It was an honor to be able to care for them, but I now feel very vulnerable.
About your situation ... why didn't your mother put this promise in her will? Why didn't your father explain the promise to your brother? If he is still competent he certainly could have arranged that you'd get the proceeds of the home sale. Why didn't he insist on honoring his promise?
DPOA is not in effect after the principal dies. Is it DPOA for your father that your brother is acting under when selling the house? It was now Dad's resource and DPOA has responsibility to act in his interest. It may be that selling the house and having the cash for Dad's continuing care seemed to be in Dad's best interest since there was no written commitment for how the house should go to you.
Your brother may have been justified in his action (depending what he did with the money) but he sure sounds like a jerk in how he went about this.
(This may not be relevant, but since there was nothing in writing, giving the house money to you would be considered a gift and would result in a penalty if your Dad needed to apply for Medicaid in the next 5 years.)
I have no idea of the likelihood of winning a court case, without something in writing.
Now I assume since your Mom had passed that all of her assets went directly to your Dad if they were jointly owned. Thus, when he passes, then his Will needs to go to probate unless he has a Revocable or Irrevocable Trust. You could make a "motion" to the Probate Court stating what had happened in the past. Whether the Court will accept that "motion" is up to the Judge.
As for your brother selling the house, I assume any equity from the house is being used for Dad's care. Dad may eventually need to go into a skilled continue care facility and those facilities can be costly. Thus, the equity from the house could dwindle down pretty quick.
Lesson learned for the future, get everything in writing and have it Notarize to avoid a lot of confusion later down the road.
You were taken advantage of by your parents (whether or not they meant for this to happen, it has). Free eldercare.
Anyone getting paid by their parents for caregiving should get it in writing and make it pay as you go for the parent. And if the parent won't do this, it becomes "pay or YOU GO."
I am so sorry that you have apparently been taken advantage of.