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My Son has lived with them for 5yrs. He doesn't have any heath care experience. My father has had open heart surgery, he has had lung cancer and limited breathing. He is admitted at least once a month into ICU with chronic breathing problems. My mother is frail, tripping and falling a lot, very forgetful,and not strong enough to take care of my father. Can my son get paid as a home healthcare provider?

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One way your son could get paid is for his grandparents to pay him a salary, or you can pay him a salary. He will need to put together an employment form stating his hourly wage, how many hours per day he will work, number of days off [if any], any vacation pay or sick leave pay, and pay for his health insurance. He will be responsible for his own payroll taxes. Does your son know CPR, how to read a blood pressure machine, and how to listen to one's heart and know if there is an issue? Does he know how to correctly pick up someone who falls. Is he ok with bathing his grandfather and bathing his grandmother?

My own opinion, no 25 year old should be giving up their life to care for their parents or their grandparents. You son will become exhausted which will create many different health issues for himself, and he will age beyond his years.

Another option is to place your parents in assistant living or some type of continuous care where they will get professionally trained help.... thus free up your son so he can get back to his own life, which will take time for him to adjust.
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Your father sounds as though he would qualify for nursing home care. My mother has the sort of lung issues and is able to stay out of the hospital due to the sharp eyes and ears of the nursing staff. Your mom would be much safer and get more socialization in an Assisted living environment.

I'm curious how your son fell into caring for your parents? Does he have a natural knack for caregiving? Perhaps pursuing training in this area would lead to a stable career, which I assume is what you want for him.
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Is your son at home 24/7? Or does he work outside of the home?

One thing he can look into is training as a Certified Nurse Assistant. You can check at community colleges, or ask at a nursing home where they have trained. I did that about 15 years ago. It's quick training, seems like it was a couple weeks of classroom and one week of lab, which was working in a nursing home. I was easily twice as old as any of my classmates. I didn't take the class to work, although I did pass the state exam and could have, but to better help my elders. My certification expired after two years, I regret now that I didn't keep it active. Anyway, that might be a good option for your son.

Other than that, I agree with freqflyer. I'm sure he's been a big help for the past five years, but it sounds as though the level of caregiving is going to be more and more advanced, and that may be too much for him. Besides, this is his prime and he needs to be with people his own age.
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Has he had a job since graduating from high school 7 years ago?

His age is the time to settle down with a job, find a wife, start a family, build a future and prepare for his own retirement. To not do this and get paid for taking care of his grandparents would rob him of an important time in his life.

His grandparents sounds like they need more care than an untrained 25 year old can give and will soon need 24/7 care which is more than just one person young or old can give without serious damage to their mental, physical, financial and social well being.

Whose idea is it for him to become the paid caretaker of your parents?

What has been your role in taking care of your parents?
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