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My mother woke up this morning crying because she thought people were in the house trying to kill her. She did not wake me up because she did not want to disturb me. How do I handle this? I told her to wake me when she had these thoughts and also told her that no one was in the house except me and her. It was weird because I can usually hear her when she wakes.

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My aunt is in a nursing home and some days she will say that they are trying to kill her, then a few days later she will say that they are nice to her. We think that she does have dementia, but we are also concerned that some of the many prescriptions that she takes may be contributing, so I would say to see the doctor and see if perhaps medication may be causing it.
I remember that my grandfather, who had already had several mini strokes, thought that cowboys on TV were actually riding into the house and were ready to shoot him. He had hearing loss which was likely making things worse, so I would say to also check out her hearing and vision.
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I took care of my godmother for several years before she had to go live in a secure Alz. Center. We lived in a small university town in the South. One night the police waked me up about 2:30 a.m.; she had called 911 to report that a man had broken in and stolen her bill-fold! There was a security light outside her window and evidently our neighbors had set it off and waked her up! The policeman asked if he could search her room while she sat in the living room with me. He found her billfold right where I told him it would be and counted out the amt. of money I told him would be in it. When he asked her if she recognized the thief, she said "Oh, yes!" and named my husband! He was still asleep in our bedroom. I waked him up and aimed him toward the living room. He sleeps very deeply and is very hard to wake up. After he talked to the policeman for a little while, we were all told to go on back to bed and to try to get some sleep. He told me that he would have to report the incident to our County Elder Care agency. The Agency sent out an investigator to find out what had happened. Neither my Godmother nor my husband remembered anything about the incident! We were encouraged to have her phone unplugged at night or have it removed altogether! A few months later, my dear Godmother who had been so dear to us, was moved to a nursing home at the insistance of our Doctor. He was MY doctor as well as hers; one day he called and said that HE had talked to the County Agency for the Frail Elderly. He had called the nursing home where she was already registered and they had a room for her. He said that taking care of her at this level would take YEARS off of our lives! I eventually came to agree with the Doctor after several more months went by. I began to relax again; slept through the night again; and lost weight I'd gained from nervous eating! She was very happy there most of the time. The whole situation was fraught with emotion.
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Lavender...take your mother to the doctor for an evaluation. As noted here by several, could be a bladder infection which can cause confusion, could be drug interaction, could be drug side effects, could be dementia, could be anxiety attacks etc. There's a variety of things that could be causing her confusion or halluciations, many can be treated. Have her checked-out by a doctor.
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Along with mylo's mom, my mom gets this way with UTIs at times. One time, she thought I was trying to rob her and tried to call the police (she wasn't able to remember how); finally *I* called them for her. Fortunately, we got a great dispatcher who felt it was medical and sent the EMTs. She was SO agitated.

It happened a second time only a couple weeks later, and I just told her I was going to go downstairs (my living space). She told me I couldn't, that her daughter's (my) cats were down there and I told her that her daughter had asked me to feed them. I locked myself in for the night, listened to her pace half the night, and took a urinalysis in for testing the next morning (when she was pretty okay again and knew who I was). Sure enough, another UTI.

So I agree, there could be something like that going on with her. The elderly become extremely altered in their thinking with UTIs.
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I feel scared, and not up to the task at times as well. I'm scared of what is yet to come. I used to think that I could get a care giver to come to my home and give my husband and I a break. I thought that she was "okay" enough that we could leave her w/ someone else and have a brief get-away. But I was putting things off because her sister died right before Christmas, which was hard on her. Now she is just recovering from a UTI. But honestly, she seems to have taken such a dive in her cognitive abilities, that I don't know if a caregiver could figure things out, or dispell her fears, or ease her confusion. It would have to be someone who knew all of the idyocyncrasies and such, or I'm afraid it would be quite horrible. She also has a cat, which makes things more difficult. She obsesses about the cat. She constantly wants to find her (and she likes to hide), and worries about feeding her, etc. Lately I've noticed she is trying to pick up the cat (a large cat and very independent creature) and manipulate her to do what SHE wants it to do. Cats don't like that. I'm afraid the cat will scratch or bite my Mom. I can't remove the cat from Mom's care, as it has become her only reason to live almost. Taking care of the cat is everything. I'm sorry. I've rambled and taken up space instead of giving an answer to Lavendar about seeing people. My Mom sees people too. And she thinks she has several cats sometimes. She thinks her Mom comes in to visit. It's not constant, but nontheless, it's disconcerting, and I always tell her she is having a realistic dream. I tell her dreams can seem so very real at times, and she usually is fine after talking about it for awhile. But, I am feeling very sad, stressed, anxious, scared, and not up to the task these days. But I just cannot imagine having her go somewhere. I just can't walk alway or give her up to others' care, as I think she would be frightened beyond belief. I am between a rock and a hard place, in a way, because I don't have a life anymore. But I love my Mom dearly, and she is so sweet all of the time. :(
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My Mom will be 92 tomorow.I took her a cake today.She lives alone and has had all of those symptoms for 35 years.I have quit trying to fix it.Other than this she is smart and active.She had loaded the wood stove today and had a fire going.We had a lot of fun and joked around.I give up about her" visitors".We know they are not real.
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Having experienced the same similar events with my MIL from this I guess you could say it is normal, at least normal for some with suffering from dellusional dementia. My MIL say gunmen outside the house and runing throuygh the house shooting at each other. She would also see orgies in the house and babies being sold. she also was chased by someone who thought she had diamond. Her story was different almost daily. It was determined that her delusions were caused by drug contradiction. Not all causes are limited to one. So many influences can create dilusions.. We found it best to go along with her and let it play out. she did in time get over them after her meds were adjusted.
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My mom had these same symptoms. It is always a UTI. Bladder infections are the worst for the elderly. She even called the police a few times. So, I would suggest that you have her tested for uti.
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lavender123 My Mom thinks she has a house full of ppl. She says that there are always little children around and guys that do nothing and young girls w/ pretty hair. She was recently diagnosed w// Alzh....around stage 5 @ this point. I asked her if these ppl scare her and she says not really, i just let them do what they want. I am in the process of trying to get her into a skilled care facility as she can barely walk and Dr told me that she needs round the clock care. These hallucinations come and go, but Im aware that as this hideous disease progresses, she will, indeed, get worse. Please take care of yourself and listen to the ppl on this site. They are soooooo helpful...theyve saved my sanity:)
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My Mom is 91 with dementia. She claimed for a week that someone came into the house and took all her cats. She only has one cat and he's right in front of her. This went on for over a week before I sat her down and asked her why she let this happen. Why didn't you call the police? Why didn't you come get me? Why would you let strange men in the house? When I asked her questions that she had to answer with logic and that involved her and her own actions, she seemed to have to admit that it must have been a dream. So in a way, I put it back on her to explain why she didn't act. Her only meds are blood pressure meds and one tylenol 3. It is a nightmare trying to deal with all the issues that come up. I try very hard to not make her feel crazy or that she's imagining things, but it's hard. I'll be headed to the doctor myself this coming week for something for anxiety every now and then. I'm just worn out on so many levels.....
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My husband also thought there were people in the house, not necessarily that they wanted to kill him, but he thought there were other people here. I have curtailed what he watches on TV, and the doctor gave him some medication. It has stopped for the time being, but every day, every hour I am waiting for the next episode of something....he also thinks we moved here just a couple of weeks ago when in reality it's been over 9 months. He also thinks we lived in this house before. I have stopped trying to tell him otherwise. I just agree with him. It's too hard to try and explain the reality. At other times, he knows everything about when we came here, what house we sold, etc. I know it's the reality of the disease, but I'm having anxiety attacks, I can't sleep and I can't eat. I've been to the doctor which has helped, and I've been talking to Alz Assoc hotline and been online to several sites. Although my husband was having some problems with memory and confusion, it was NOTHING like this which started suddenly on Christmas Day. This disease is a nightmare for both the patient and the caregiver, and I only hope and pray I am up to the task.
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This had to be upsetting for both of you.
You don't say if your mom has been diagnosed with dementia. Also, how often does this happen? If she just had a nightmare that she had trouble getting rid of, that's one thing. But if she was awake and having these thoughts, then that's another. Also, if this a is frequent occurrence, she may be developing paranoia, which often goes along with some types of dementia.
You may want to take her to see a doctor and see if she should be tested for Alzheimer's or another dementia. If she already is diagnosed, and this is new behavior, you probably should let her doctor know about this. He or she may want to add or change medications.
It's good of you to keep such a close eye on how she's doing.
Take care,
Carol
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