It isnt my fault now. I didnt get pregnant 10 days after he died, you did. I had to navigate the stormy aftermath by myself, by myself. You, on the other hand, rode above the storm expecting twins in Sept.
I endured the crushing blows of denied life insurence. It wasn't an accident. His aorta blowing out was unexspected, "out of the blue", but not a ACCIDENT. If he was up a ladder when it happened and he fell that makes it an ACCIDENT. That's the difference between 100,000 and nothing. And nothing is what I got, nothing. Nine months later we have our twins with their father, age 31, is in jail on sex charges with our 13 yr old grand daughter. It took them a year to charge him. Sentencing is scheduled for the end of November 2022. Just in time to mark Kevins 2nd year gone. Its not my fault. I'm done. I paid my dues, faithfully, heart brakingly. I know your confused and baffled by us, we too, are confused and baffled by us. We've worked all our lives, we knew what needed to be done and we did it. We've never been this old and this tired and this sad. Let us just talk. Without redirection, without scolding and shaming us because THIS IS HOW WE FEEL. Please just Let us talk, we're not going to be here to much longer, let US talk. You can't fix it, we're not asking you to fix anything. Will somebody just listen to us? You've got your lives ahead of you, we want to go to sleep and call it done. Please? If you truly love us, let us go.
Life insurance should pay off when a person dies; it's the 'accidental death benefit' that wouldn't pay off if there was no accident involved.
My condolences on the loss of your husband. Grief is a terrible thing to endure.
You're welcome to 'talk' to the forum and to ask a question if you have one. Or to vent, if that's what you're doing, but your post doesn't make much sense.
Wishing you peace in your life, but if you're thinking of suicide, then you should call the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline by dialing 988.
May I suggest you consider something like:
https://www.talkspace.com
May you receive peace in your heart!
With the utmost and highest respect to you, there is a big difference between a person needing to talk and vent a bit and habitual, endless complaining. The latter is the reason why most people don't pay much mind to the elderly. Everyone has problems of their own and the world can be a f'ed up place sometimes. No one needs a constant stream of negativity and misery spreading and so often this is exactly what seniors will deliver on. I know this because I was a senior caregiver for 25 years. Elderly people belong in the company of elderly people. When younger people get thrown in the mix, venting very quickly turns into abusive neediness.
People re-direct an elderly person because they're trying to keep a situation from escalating and upsetting the person. That's an act of kindness. Also, a person cannot anwer the same question or repeat the same statement over and over and over again. When they try to tempers flare, things escalate and the conditions become perfect for potential elder abuse. Nobody wants that.
Seniors working all their lives also got paid. No one did it for free. Seniors who took care of business and raised a family does not give them a free pass to behave anyway they want or to 'speak their mind' no matter how hurtful or offensive they may be. Just because someone was fortunate enough to reach old age and did not expire in the bloom of youth does not mean they are owed any indulgences.
I am 80.
That doesn't excuse my behavior unless I also suffer from dementia.
We all have our strong points. We are all capable of choosing how we act and react while we still have our minds. We are all responsible for our behavior. We all need to give and to receive affection and forgiveness.
Old is just another adjective while we are in control of our minds, while we are "ourselves".
You are so awesome. I love your response and wish it could be put onto postcards and mailed to every senior citizen in the country.