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I have had a rough week but started thinking of how rarely i think about myself or do anything for myself.

The reason I started thinking about this was my sister was here last week and I noticed how put together she was. Up to date clothes, haircut, nails, pedicure, nice jewelry... as opposed to me who had gray roots showing, hair pulled back, nails and toenails just whacked off, no makeup, old worn clothes... etc.

I have always (even before my caregiving crisis) had a hard time taking care of myself and spending any money on myself. I have a theory that other caregiver type personalities are also that way.

Anyway I set up some reminders on my iphone to do at least 2 things for myself every week (most likely i will do the declutter thing every week if i can). Some on the list can range from very small to larger things. Some cost money.. but you can also do things that might boost your mood a little without spending money.. or a lot of money. I have a decent job so I can afford to splurge a little.. right now anyway.

Here is my list:
Get a Haircut
Manicure/pedicure
Buy flowers - plant or cut flowers
get car detailed
arrange for professional house cleaning (one time or ongoing)
declutter something (closet/drawers)
upgrade/replace an item in wardrobe
upgrade/replace a home item (kitchen/bathroom)
arrange a weekend getaway or vacation
get dental, eye checkups

This challenge will be VERY hard for me.. but I thought i would post it to help me follow through. Anyone want to join me?

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I like your enthusiasm ! Every single thing on your list is on mine as well. Totally doable too. I just don't do it. Seems I'm always doing something else before I make it to the list?

Wait... I de-cluttered the fridge. Does that count?

Seriously, I do love the idea of a list and slowly checking off .... one at a time :)
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I like your list. I am off Friday so I challenge you to decluttering a clostet or 2. O post back on Friday if I accomplished at least one. Let me know how you are doing too. We can spur each other on.
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Thanks Jeanette.
I'm not sure how enthusiastic I am.. but I think it is something I need to focus on for sure. I do think de-cluttering the fridge counts as long as it is something that makes YOU feel good and gives you a sense of satisfaction. (I knowling seeing a clean organized fridge would make me feel good).. its all about YOU!

Sharynmarie,
That sounds good.. i will get started on my bedroom closet this week and will post an update!
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Great, maybe we can motive each other!
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I hope ik you have success taking care of things.I know it is hard. One closet done.
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katie, i think your sis is a pretentious t*at .. im a greasy , multi painted up disaster right now but thats what it takes to get the results i want ..
what have i done for me ? tightened up my neglected business equiptment for 9 months .. mom appeared to me in a dream . she said , i left you a few bucks d*ckhole , get that machinery working . get the short bus running , i like it , lol ..
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she said take care of my sister , shes a fragile little thing ..
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After four h*ellish years of caring for her my narc mother went into a NH eighteen months ago. The following year was a whirlwind of clearing, renovating, selling her house and moving myself. I finally put a stop to the daily screaming tantrum phone calls, was quite unwell all last winter and still recovering from it all.

Today I'll try to get the house in some sort of order (undergoing renovations), play with my dogs, do laundry, some gardening and just drink in the heavenly solitude and peace and quiet out here in the country.
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I might not do much for myself BUT I make sure I get my color done every 3 weeks. My Dad was fully white at 26, so I've had roots since I was a teen.

I worked for 10+ years at the Salon I go to before I had to quit to care for Mom so I have hair maintence drilled in my head!!
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One of my favorite things to do is to lie on my bed in the afternoon and watch old movies on TCM, or other programs that I have recorded. In addition, I plan to take a day trip soon, but I have not made definite plans yet.
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Lol captain...maybe so. My sis has no idea..she texted me this morning that she is getting ready for her beach vaca next week....whilst i am packing up to pick up my parents and bring them here for a week of dr.s appts. Gee...what happened to her"help".

Anyway unfortunately my hair is still grey and growing out...so no headway there. I did manage to begin decluttering my closets though. My goal is to get my house in good enough shape to get a professional housecleaning once a week or so..i have to clean enough to get my house cleaned...lol.

Watching old movies sounds relaxing whitney! Congrats Sharynmarie for cleaning a closet!

Enjoy your day Ashlynne..heavenly solitude!
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Katie~I have so much craft stuff in one closet it is crazy. I like your idea of decluttering then getting professional cleaning done. That is a good goal.
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I wouldn't let a cleaning lady in here, it's not clean enough lol
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Too funny. Same here, gotta get this house clean so I can get it cleaned once a week. Now that, is a damn shame!
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I'm finishing my third year of a three year full time art course this June. I think this is an achievement for a woman in her mid sixties, though it is firmly ignored by mother who thinks I should drop everything, move out of my city apartment and move in with her in a small town where most of the inhabitants don't speak English. My sister who is sickly also seems uninterested though polite. I guess this is why I am telling this to a group of strangers who often seem more interested and concerned than people who are related to me physically but not in any other way.

The digital photography and computer work was the toughest for me. I really like photography now.

It is a wonder I have any self-confidence at all. I'm actually expecting a barrage of hostility from my mother who does not like me to be successful at anything. With her, when I win, I fail. I can understand the confusion of my earlier years now.

So, what I did for myself was to stick out a course with a phenomenal drop out rate, and I'm graduating in June.
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I love your enthusiasm AND your list....what is really sad is that mowing my yard today in defiance of approaching company is something I did for me today....haha....that brought me a lot of joy for some odd reason. But I am definitely going to put getting a new hairstyle and a pedicure on my list....and soon....
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I went and played two hours of pickleball this morning. I love that game! In the second hour, I played against two older ladies (had to be late 70s at least?) who didn't know the rules and were just learning the game. It was a blast!

I have rediscovered physical exercise and how good it feels for me both physically and mentally. I took a walk this afternoon, just to keep it going. I was going to buy a pool pass to our local pool, but they were closed. :( At least I got a good walk in. I need to lose another 50 lbs (I'm down 10 so far). So I encourage all of you to find some physical outlet if you feel that would help you. It really helps me burn off extra energy/frustration/anger. Which I need. :)
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If you need encouragement to do the decluttering and cleaning, check out the website flylady. She's been around for years, has hundreds of thousands of followers, and it's all free. It's a supportive website and babysteps are encouraged. It helps you to develop good habits and get organized. Anyhow, for myself I'm trying to work on several issues and being attached to a support group helps no matter whether it's financial, caregiving or something else. Right now I'm working a temporary job during early voting in NV. It gets me out into some neighborhoods I wouldn't necessarily visit and enjoy some new experiences while getting paid. Volunteer work is good if you can do it.
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Hi everyone!
Hope everyone is at least thinking about doing something just for themselves! This is a difficult week for me as my parents are staying with me this week and I'm taking both to different dr.'s appointments. Just having them here really takes the focus off me and onto them... but I am STILL going to try to focus back on myself (even just a little).

I did do some decluttering .... got one drawer done and still working on my bedroom closet. Closet is a huge job. I also ordered a couple of new shirts. I went to Lowes and looked at flowers but haven't purchased any yet. There were some beautiful pink hibiscous there and I am planning to go back and get a couple to put on my patio table outside.. I can open the window and see them througout the house.

Vegaslady, I actually am a member at flylady and you have reminded me to go back there for my decluttering support!. Sometimes I feel overwhelmed and don't know where to even start. I like the idea of just doing 15 minutes a day... I can always handle 15 minutes and it doesn't seem so overwhelming.

Thanks for all the great responses! Lets keep reminding ourselves that we count too. Seems like it is so easy for me to forget about my own needs.

Have a good day all!
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My week has been stressful..hubby and I went into the mountains yesterday to get away from home issues. Today I decluttered an awkward shaped cupboard in the kitchen we have used for tupperware and other plastic ware we no longer use. I filled up 3 30 gallon trash bags, relined the shelves and am currently using this space for the item I need when I cook on my days off. Hubby will have an adjustment period....oh well!!
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I wish I could find a little time for me. But that's not in any near future. My day consists of diaper changing feeding lifting medicating and on and on. Sad thing about it this is for my mil and her daughter lives right beside us. She is relaxing out in sun reading a book. I turn 50 Monday. She says to me " we'll I'm not gonna be around, but what are you gonn do for your bday" I wanted to punch that fat 4x4 in her you know what.
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biding my time. ill keep working and spending nothing until the day i can fly to germany and get f-ed up as hogans goat at the wacken metal fest . it wouldnt do for someone to offer me employment there either. id shred that return plane ticket like edible underwear..
love america but the old world gives you body rushes that seem to span centuries..
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Setting a timer to stay on task really helps with the house decluttering.
Dad watches the news from 4-7 pm so when it starts I sit out on the patio and admire my gardens with an adult beverage.
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Well today I went grocery shopping and dropped off fruit and juice to Mommie Dearest in the nursing home. I dread going there, just me, me, me, me, complaints and nastiness. Wipes me out for the rest of the day, but I have cleared and defrosted my freezer so it's snow free and tidy. Now I can fill it with "specials" before winter (I live out in the country). Fed my animals and going to plop in front of tv with my supper. Tomorrow is another day - one day at a time girls.
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After a harrowing morning of medical semi-emergencies, I had such a fun afternoon. I took my rabbit over to a lady's house so maybe he can find a bunny girlfriend. I spent much of the afternoon just sitting on the floors with the rabbits and talking to the lady. It was fun to talk to someone my own age who has much the same interests. Funny how sitting around chatting and watching rabbits can be so much fun.
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I would get on a Harley and ride fast against the wind. You know, when a hornet flies down your vest and stings you, it makes all your troubles seem so far away....LOL
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I gave up my slipper shoe clogs and bought new sneakers. My feet feel WONDERFUL!
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I love this thread and it makes me happy to see people who give so much take a little me time back. Enjoy your mani, pedi, gardening or movie! God Bless you all.
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Today was such a great day. Mil wasn't feeling good so after breakfast she slept all day. That in itself makes a great day. But it's first time since snow left that I got time to spend in my flower garden and my water features all put in. We live 2blocks from the most beautiful beach in northern michigan. Hubby and I went and took most awesome pics of sunset. It was the best day in at least 4 years!!! Now she had dinner (very late) and she is in bed so we and neighbors have a fire going and lotsa drinks. I'm a gin and grapefruit person. Tonight it's cause I'm enjoying them instead of drinking them to fall asleep and dull my sences. Oh what a beautiful day!!!!
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I've been craving so badly the yogurt from Yogurtland. Unfortunately, my fave niece used to work there. She told me some of the things customers do to those yogurt dispensers...like pull down the handle so that the yogurt comes out, scoop it and lick their spoon/or fingers. Then, go to the next dispenser, do the same - with the spoon/finger touching the tip of the hole! Then, theres how they set out the ingredients for the customers to scoop up and put in their yogurt. She's seen people touching it, or putting it back in, etc.. and the children just touching it all. How she wanted to find ways to prevent this but her boss said No. So niece told me that since then, she only buys yogurt when they first open up and no customers been touching the dispensers and the food. I am sooooo craving that yogurt!!!! Instead, I bought 2 bottles of Pepsi. Pretending that it's what I'm craving...
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