How do you handle terrible hallucinations and delusions?

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How do you handle terrible hallucinations and delusions?

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Try telling her that they're trying to torture you and your sister as well; that you have seen them and are doing things to protect all of you. Reinforced to her that it's not you doing it but THEM. Also tell her you have taken steps to have them captured. Tell her you don't want her to die because you need to her to protect you! Sometimes you have to go along with the hallucinations. If you tell her she has special powers and sees things that you don't always see, that may help.

The main thing you have to do as understand that this is normal and that you need to reinforce to her that you need her. I deal with things like this and much more with my 91 1/2 year old father. It makes him happy when I join in and tell him how much I need him. Reinforce that bond of love. In her own way that's what she's crying for.

Dad takes a low dose of zyprexa at night and it helps. What helps the most is taking time to show love and protection!

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I’m SO sorry you’re having to go thorough this. It sounds just terrible and I feel for you. Several doctors who have worked with our mother, who started on Seroquel, wanted her off of it as soon as possible as it would not work for her paranoia (which has been diagnosed as severe, but diesn’t Sound as severe as what your mother is going through) and psychosis. Our mother also has ALZ. She’s been on risperidone for about one week now. She is in memory care now and because of her uncontrollable outbursts and verbal violence, we’ve been asked to stay away so she has time to adjust. We check in everyday and have been told be two separate care givers that she is showing good signs of calming. Not sedation, but calming, and we may be able to visit her soon. Maybe this can help? Please take care of YOU.

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Glad to hear your mom is improving. We may have to move my aunt to Memory Care in the future due to her ALZ. For now she shares a room with her husband in Assisted Living (they are there only because DSS took on their case and got them placed—with my blessing, I will say).

Please let us know how your mom continues to do in her new space. I pray she'll feel secure and loved. I can't imagine being a caregiver in a Memory Care unit!

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Been there, done that, got the T-shirt! Went through the same thing with my father in early stages of Lewy body dementia. He accused one caregiver of sexual abuse; he imagined men trying to break into the house to hurt the caregivers; he insisted the microwave would not work until his outside security light came on, my brother and his wife were lying dead in the backyard, the neighbor kids were banging on his windows in the middle of the night, etc. This 80-year-old man would chase the caregivers out of the house to their cars, bang on the windows until they drove out of the driveway! After the third incident of this, I called the squad to have him taken to ER. They put him in a psych hospital for 30 days; that Dr had him on different meds; the hallucinations and car chasing stopped, and he slept through the night, but he was always stoned. I then found a neurologist to help us and he took him off many of them. He is still on Seroquel 11 yrs later, but has his regular personality. The psych meds are trial and error - you need a doctor to continuously tweak them - but they help. Good Luck!

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Wow! That appears to be the worst case I've either seen or read about. I'm glad you found a solution that worked. Have you ever told him about what had happened before the doctors got this under control?

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I know the stress of things coming at you from out of nowhere. My mom was bedridden in my home with numerous medical issues. When she went on hospice it got a bit better. There was a difficult stage she went through with terrible hallucinations that would often scare me as well but I had to remain calm. She would yell in the middle of the night that furniture fell over in her room, someone was looking in the window, (particularly scary as it was on the first floor), or someone rang the doorbell at 3 am.....Particularly bizarre was the hallucination that a woman's head was on top of mom's TV spinning around. Where does this come from!!?? I would calmly tell her it was ok and she would eventually calm down. I also kept a low wattage light on in her room, but that may not work for everyone. I hope the hallucination stage passes. Please remember to take care of yourself with little things like a good cup of coffee or watching birds or a sunset at this time too! I went through tons of adult coloring books during this stage.

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My Dad (88yrs) has dementia also. One day Mom (86yrs) called me frantic, she could not keep Dad in the house. Dad was insisting someone was picking him up for kidney stone surgery. Mom got Dad on the phone. I asked Dad "What is going on Dad?" Dad said "I am having surgery today." I said "well I don't know of that happening today" Dad got upset "Why does everyone treat me like I am crazy? I should just jump out the window on my head!" Mom and Dad were both suffering at that moment, I didn't know what to do. I asked Dad who the surgeon is. I told Dad I would get answers and call him back. I waited a few minutes and called back. I told my Dad that I called the Doctor and they had to cancel the surgery due to the surgeon having a stomach virus. That diffused the whole situation. Dad felt like he was right and not crazy. Mom was relieved...all over. I has been my experience that the dementia patients totally believe what they are experiencing is true, they do not want to lose dignity.

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yes. It does no good to disagree. During nursing school decades ago, Mom said that women were routinely given something called "twilight sleep" while in labor. These women had no awareness or memory of their actions. Some were known to stand on their bed and demand to go home.....while in active labor. Mom found the best way to help these patients was to go along with them and with a calm voice encourage them to lay down until their ride arrived. She diffused some difficult situations that way. Your example of "calling the doctor" and coming up with a reason that fits with their delusion is better....you're not doubting them. My reason for my illustration is two-fold. One, it isn't constructive to oppose your LO in this condition; that only increases their frustration and agitation. Two, even young, healthy individuals can have crazy delusions because of medication.

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My Mom had similar hallucinations; a red haired guy was climbing out of the drain in street and coming to get her. Many more besides that. She would hide in her closet at night she was so terrified. I put a mattress on floor in there for her to sleep on since could not get her to stop getting out of bed and would find her curled up in corner of closet. She would get in there and pile up all her shoes around her and other junk.
That went on for over a year. Finally got her on Trazadone at night and helped immensely. She was still very paranoid but not as bad. Also added Seroquel in am. That stage seemed like would never end. She was diagnosed 5 years ago. The paranoia lessened about a year and 1/2 ago. It is nowhere near what it used to be. Still sometimes she thinks her food is poisoned but much better than before. Hoping your Mom will pass out of this stage sooner than later. It will pass; many hugs in this difficult time.

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How did you get her to take meds for her condition? My mom absolutely refuses and doesn’t want to talk about it. She thinks everyone is out to harm her: poison, torture, watching her every minute, controlling what she can and cannot do. Stealing or destroying her possessions. How do you convince her to trust the doctor and take the medication?

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I imagine Mom is on Medication for this? At any Rate, I know where you are Coming from. Been there and Done That, At a Few Nursing facilities. We just Ignored them, Tried to Comfort them, But of Course, We didn't have to Live with them.
You might eventually want to Consider a Nursing Facility for your Own at Home, Peace of Mind.

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im afraid i dont have any answers for you but i have a similar problem. My mother lives outside a quiet village on the road to nowhere but to hear her talk its crime central with villains and thugs roaming around waiting to do harm to her. Besides these anonymous people, my brother is poisoning her. They hide her things for a joke and she fears for her life. I don't cope well because you cant reason and you cant go along with it. Its hard. I am looking for an answer but I don't think there is one. Just keep going, doing your best and be kind to yourself. Love and best wishes

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You hit the nail on the head about not being able to reason OR go along with it. It helps me to know others are experiencing this. Thank you for your reply

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I am going through the same thing exactly with my fiancé’s mother. It’s a nightmare. Everyday is a battle. We have changed meds several times. She is also on Seroquel and like you it’s hard to see if it’s working. She is also on Zoloft and lorazepam. She has three personalities that I have named. Before my fiancé comes home from work I send him a text to let him know which one she is. It’s either crazy Maria who thinks people are going to steal her things so she hides her stuff in drawers and in the closet and puts clothes and towels on top of them, she thinks her sister is coming to get her so she is always pulling everything out of her closet and drawers to pack, nasty Nancy who is just nasty and combative or Sally whom walks around hallucinating, seeing people, hearing things and just paranoid. She follows me all over and just babbles. I don’t understand her most of the time. She also comes up with bazaar stories. She thinks there is a lady that comes to pick her up and brings her to a house and brings her back. She says the woman comes through her bedroom window and goes back out the window. She sits on the couch and forgets where she is at and asks when we are leaving to go home. She goes to the door several times waiting for her husband to come home when he passed away three years ago. She is always falling and she calls her sisters at all hours of the night. She does not sleep well therefore I don’t get much sleep either. There is so much more that happens with dementia and so far there is nothing that helps her sleep. It is a nightmare trying to deal with this 24/7. My next step is a Phycologist to see what we can do as this disease gets worse. She is at the latter stage and I am told it just gets harder. I try my best to stay healthy. I have a gym and I walk my dogs as much as I can. I have always been an outdoorsy person and very much into working out. Having to deal with someone with Dementia is one of the biggest challenges I have ever faced. It draining and sucks you dry. I refuse to go on meds so I exercise and work on art projects along with refurbishing furniture. In the summer I do a lot of yard work while she sits on the deck. You are always watching and waiting for things to happen. They say it’s like taking care of a child. It’s not like that, it’s in a category of its own. A child eventually learns what is right from wrong. Someone with dementia forgets everything and the brain forgets what you told them. They do not learn anymore and they do things that will blow your mind.
So as far as anyone going through what you are, the answer is yes. People say one day at a time but living with a person with dementia is like one day running into the next. Always stay on your toes just waiting for the next disaster.
Good luck with your journey. When it’s over you can breathe again.

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This is so true. All of it. Sorry you are going through this.

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She needs a neurologist who can prescribe and adjust meds.

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I wish there was an answer - I fight it daily with my mother and my husband who are both in an assisted living facility and both with advanced dementia that worsens daily. My husband is the most combative - mom is just angry. It makes sharing time with them difficult despite loving them both so much. They are angry, combative, and don't want to hear anything contrary to what they think is real so I've learned to try to go with the flow and not ruffle feathers so I can go home at the end of the day and have some sanity left.

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Oh my God, I am so sorry you have to deal with both of them at the same time. I think I’m going to lose my mind with just one. You must be a saint.

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My mom is in nursing home with dementia and she lost my dad two months ago. She started asking where did they move him as he was in the room next door when he passed. She got very depressed so they started her on meds to treat that and dementia which now she is seeing bugs on ceiling and getting more actively weird when she talks. I asked for uti check they said no symptoms so no urinalysis done.

I try to visit at least five times a week, but it is difficult when not sure if she knows you and she can say rude things. The mom I once knew is gone but will continue to visit.

Many days it is a struggle and I find a lot of similarities with a small child.

i feel your pain

melissa

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Melissa, I suggest revisiting the UTI aspect. I don’t know what symptoms they’re looking for but hallucinations and new bizzare behavior ARE symptoms of UTI. Sometimes there’s a strong smelling urine or may have a low grade fever, but not necessarily. Her first RN wanted 2 or more symptoms, but I’ve worn them down. My moms hallucinations are basically her only symptom, and she has tested positive in 90% of those instances. (The other times it was med induced, and the rest is insomnia/agitation.) They now test her when she’s seeing people or “back at work”. If you’re local you could even do a quick AZO test on her which if positive would give you some backup when you ask.

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Man, I feel your pain. Our LO isn’t having persistent delusions, but instead perseverates constantly about horrible things that may befall family members (car accidents, cats being hit by cars, kids breaking things, neighbors dying, etc). It is like having a miniature Greek chorus, always predicting the tragic end to any and every daily event. It has sucked the joy out of the most simple things, like sitting down to breakfast. It’s amazing. I never knew what an optimist I was!

In any case, we are going to look into a geriatric psychiatrist for her... hoping that there may be some medication that migh alieviate some of her anxiety. Have you guys consulted a specialist like this, or a neurologist? They can try a variety of things pharmacologically that could make continuing to care for your mom at home more workable. We are hoping for a similar outcome over here at our ‘happy’ house.

Good luck, and God bless ~

Andy

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I think Mom is past the point she can be cared by you. If medication is not helping maybe she needs a stay in a Psychiatric facility. They can try different "mixtures" till one works.

How many people live in her house? Maybe part of the problem. Too much stimulant.

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Meds may help.

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How do you handle terrible hallucinations and delusions?

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