My mother moved in around March 2020 and was supposed to be out by now. She is 66 and is verbally, emotionally, and as of today physically abusive. She is becoming more and more dysfunctional and I cannot deal with this anymore. I am not her caregiver and would NOT like to take on that roll. She is losing her eyesight and hearing and needs to be in some type of care facility, but her income is low. She has undiagnosed mental issues and refuses to get help. Please help! Where do I start with getting her out my home?
Or set a date for her to be out. Put it in writing. If she does not leave, go to the sheriff’s office and have her evicted. You do not have to keep her. Let the state be her guardian. They will find her care.
The next step is to call 911 the next time her terrible behavior starts up. Tell them that you need an ambulance because she is mentally ill and that you fear being harmed by her and that you fear she will harm herself.
They will take her to the hospital and likely keep her there for a 72 hour psychiatric evaluation. She will also get a physical assessment. During that time a social worker from the hospital will contact you to talk because your mother has been living at your house. You must tell them that you never agreed to be her caregiver and refuse to do it because you are unable to. Tell them that she came for a visit in March and has been squatting at your house ever since because she refuses to leave.
Because of her age 66 and also going blind and deaf they will likely place her in a nursing home because of these conditions. They will put her in one for mental illness too if she is a non-functioning adult at risk. This is the best possible outcome
depending on nursing home availability and what the mental/physical assessment in the hospital determines. They may also transport her to a homeless shelter if they're unable to find her a bed right away in a nursing home facility.
The fact you have already made the poor choice to take her in makes all this very problematic indeed. I honestly am at a loss to tell you where to begin and I hope that others will have better ideas for you. You are likely aware of your Mom's income. Were you to find a place nearby, studio or room rental would she go to it.
Ultimately, as to the abuse she is now physically leveling on you I think that may be actually the only GOOD thing you can use. Call the police and see about getting her removed to hospital, shelter or wherever and tell them you are in fear for your life. They may call EMS and have her transported to ER. Once there refuse to take her back in.
I hope others have better advice for you than I am able to give you. This will be a really serious problem for you and a serious warning to others thinking they can care for a mentally ill senior in their home. Wish you the best of luck and hope you'll update us as to what works.