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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington. Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services. APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid. We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour. APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment. You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints. Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights. APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.I agree that: A.I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information"). B.APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink. C.APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site. D.If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records. E.This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year. F.You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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Mostly Independent
Your loved one may not require home care or assisted living services at this time. However, continue to monitor their condition for changes and consider occasional in-home care services for help as needed.
Remember, this assessment is not a substitute for professional advice.
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I went through the scenarios you described with my mom. She would leave her phone a home and go out. When she didn’t answer it was very concerning. My mom is independent and still drives, but lives alone. My solution is a night light that sends a text each morning and tells me what time she wakes up and the most recent movement. I choose to have it report at 9 am even though she gets up and down to the kitchen at 6:18 +/- 10 minutes everyday. Just seeing that text lets me know she is okay.
When I saw the title of this article, I hoped to learn some insight into why my siblings, who are all far out of state, act the way they do. Basically they do not trust that I can handle things here with our parents (and a caregiver). They seek to undermine me, they will do things like insist that Dad gets an xray on his ankle, simply because he fell, even though I had already taken several looks at it (as well as the caregiver), but since the out-of-town person used to work as an EMT, and insisted on having it xrayed, Dad then expected me to immediately drop everything and take him to Dr office. This is just one of many times where I cannot preserve my own autonomy anymore, sibligns are telling parents what to do, and not trusting me (by the way, the ankle was absolutely not broken or even sprained, just sore, and the look in the Doctor's eyes as he rolled them back....like, "What did you bring him in here for?"). It took me 5 hours to go to that ridiculous Doctor visit, and now my parents have yet another medical bill that could have been avoided. All because a former EMT, said over the phone "you really ought to have that xrayed". Sheesz.
I am 3 hours away from my mother who is in a nursing home. She had me believing that she was paralyzed and could not move her legs. I argued with staff and doctors stating to please find out what was wrong. Did I look like an idiot when I came to visit my mother unexpectedly and was surprised to see her in bed doing leg lifts, and then slid out of the bed with the help of an aid, got into a wheel chair, and eventually walked with a walker!!! It is hard to understand that my mother is not the person she used to be. She knows how to play me and make me feel guilty for her being placed there. Sometimes distance plays tricks, festers up guilt, but then again, the 3 hour drive is always the only time I can have total quiet and reflection time. It has taken almost 4 months for me to get to this point, acceptance is the key. Don't believe anything you hear, see it for yourself; be a peace with yourself, and leave the rest to God and the professional team that cares for your loved one.
This is a great article, I wish I saw this 4 years ago. My SIL was going through brain cancer, we are 7 hours away. We were in town at Christmas (her favorite holiday). She didn't want us to visit, very out of character. I tried to get my wife to go see her and she said "she didn't want us to visit so be it". I figured something was wrong but I respected her wishes. 3 months later and a fast trip to her hospital we were back on the way home with her in tow. We lost her in 2 1/2 months. Had we seen her at Christmas we would have seen she had been falling, throwing trash down the stairs to the basement (had a very tidy house) and she was unsteady on her feet. We would have had her under our care for just a bit longer. Its not always easy long distance, sometimes its not always what you hear but what you see as well.
All really helpful and realistic advice! I wish I had known what to look for! My parents were in a transitional facility...they were in an independent apartment for 10 years. I would visit 3 or 4 times a year. I should have noticed the mail, the clutter, the old food....but I think subconsciously I didn't want to face IT! I looked to the staff for direction; they said my parents were fine. They really were not; they ended up both needing special care which they did receive...in two different facilities! So much for paying for the transition situation. I finally moved them 1000 miles to be close to me, their only living child. SOOOOO much better. They were back together and we have daily visits now! Best of all, when my sweet daddy's life was ending, I had the honor of holding him as God took his hand. So thankful I will hopefully be able to do the same when it's my momma's time.
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By proceeding, I agree that I understand the following disclosures:
I. How We Work in Washington.
Based on your preferences, we provide you with information about one or more of our contracted senior living providers ("Participating Communities") and provide your Senior Living Care Information to Participating Communities. The Participating Communities may contact you directly regarding their services.
APFM does not endorse or recommend any provider. It is your sole responsibility to select the appropriate care for yourself or your loved one. We work with both you and the Participating Communities in your search. We do not permit our Advisors to have an ownership interest in Participating Communities.
II. How We Are Paid.
We do not charge you any fee – we are paid by the Participating Communities. Some Participating Communities pay us a percentage of the first month's standard rate for the rent and care services you select. We invoice these fees after the senior moves in.
III. When We Tour.
APFM tours certain Participating Communities in Washington (typically more in metropolitan areas than in rural areas.) During the 12 month period prior to December 31, 2017, we toured 86.2% of Participating Communities with capacity for 20 or more residents.
IV. No Obligation or Commitment.
You have no obligation to use or to continue to use our services. Because you pay no fee to us, you will never need to ask for a refund.
V. Complaints.
Please contact our Family Feedback Line at (866) 584-7340 or ConsumerFeedback@aplaceformom.com to report any complaint. Consumers have many avenues to address a dispute with any referral service company, including the right to file a complaint with the Attorney General's office at: Consumer Protection Division, 800 5th Avenue, Ste. 2000, Seattle, 98104 or 800-551-4636.
VI. No Waiver of Your Rights.
APFM does not (and may not) require or even ask consumers seeking senior housing or care services in Washington State to sign waivers of liability for losses of personal property or injury or to sign waivers of any rights established under law.
I agree that:
A.
I authorize A Place For Mom ("APFM") to collect certain personal and contact detail information, as well as relevant health care information about me or from me about the senior family member or relative I am assisting ("Senior Living Care Information").
B.
APFM may provide information to me electronically. My electronic signature on agreements and documents has the same effect as if I signed them in ink.
C.
APFM may send all communications to me electronically via e-mail or by access to an APFM web site.
D.
If I want a paper copy, I can print a copy of the Disclosures or download the Disclosures for my records.
E.
This E-Sign Acknowledgement and Authorization applies to these Disclosures and all future Disclosures related to APFM's services, unless I revoke my authorization. You may revoke this authorization in writing at any time (except where we have already disclosed information before receiving your revocation.) This authorization will expire after one year.
F.
You consent to APFM's reaching out to you using a phone system than can auto-dial numbers (we miss rotary phones, too!), but this consent is not required to use our service.
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6 Tips for Long-Distance Caregivers